alive

I've finally come to realize that we are all the same If there's nothing left to lose then there's every to gain All the paragraphs and pages you could write could not contain It is curious and careless and it's flowing through my veins The fear of growing old, and doing what you're told You can't disguise a heart while it's breaking You hide behind the smile you're faking It's all about the the chance you're taking Oh, and you know that you're making it all come alive If your life is so damn comfortable then why do you complain? A reflection in the alcohol you're pouring down the drain Just because you paint a picture doesn't mean it fits the frame This is my West Coast intervention and I'm getting on that plane When all of your mistakes are keeping you awake The sun is setting and it's ending 'cause you're letting it go Forgetting everything you already know And it all goes to show that you're moving to slow It will end up changing you, Life flies by so you have to embrace it Forget the past 'cause you cannot erase it So live the dream, and learn to chase it And when you can almost taste it It's all come alive

Hi Sweetheart,

I'd show you what it'd be like to have it all.
& i'd still love you when the lights went out

lifetime thoughts

people have to face regrets. becoming mature means learning to accept
what you cannot change, facing unresolved
sorrows and learning to love life as it really happens, not as you would have it happen..life isn't supposed to be an all or nothing battle between misery & bliss, it isn't supposed
to be a battle at all. & when it comes to happiness, sometimes life is just okay, sometimes
it's comfortable, sometimes wonderful, sometimes boring, & sometimes unpleasant. when
your day's not perfect, it's not a failure or a terrible loss. it's just another day
disguises will never work everyone knows who you are. you aren't
fooling anybody. don't act up above your standards

destination

You're amazing but you're taking too much time
I’ve only got six candles left And I’m trying to keep this off my mind
It’s getting darker but it’s the way they make me feel
They try to fill my head with questions
They all doubt you but I know you're real
If it takes time then I’ll be patient
Know that I will still believe I’ll take your hand and hold it tightly 'cause
I know you’ll carry me
Take me high, Take me in, Take these last six candles
And when I’m tired, and wearing thin
Give me the strength to carry on
Here I am, see my hands, take these last six candles
We’re moving on, we’ll keep, keep, moving on
And I’m so thankful for every breath I take
There's not a moment that goes by I waste wiping tears out of my crying face
Don’t look so sad, you’ve missed the point
I’m still so glad I knew you against the odds
I’ll take my chances and burn this candle through you
If I could ever see the way you understand me
When no one else can see it I know you surround me
I’ll be the one who listens only when you tell me
Not walking but running, not talking, yelling
And they might never understand why I do what I do
But I can only speak my mind
And what I feel is true I’ll take a vow to be the only one who stands if it takes
All that I am, I will be standing, there

shattered & rebuilt promises

But
i can't promise you perfection, cause that is not who i am.
i can't promise you forever, cause i don't hold fate within my hands.
i can't promise you the sunshine, because i know there will be rain.
i can't promise you complete happiness, cause with true love, there comes pain.
i can't promise to always smile, cause life always has a way to make me cry.
i can't promise to always stand strong, cause it's never easy to want to give life another try
all i can promise you is me myself and i.
i can promise to always be there when you need someone.
i can promise to be fully loyal and love you to the best of my abilities.
I can promise to fight for this when things get rough

and most of all not give up without that fight

please explain

why am i so afraid?
♥
to crash down,
♥
and lose my heart again

Artistic Touch

rant # a millon

i think we put too much effort into believing in people,situations & relationships. Thinking things can or will change. thinking that people do change and sometimes, time fixes things. I think when you believe someone can change or things change, you leave yourself in a situation you cant get out of. Cause now all thoughts, talks, and action are based on false hope of change. Sometimes we're too scared to give up because we don't know what else we'll find. Sometimes we stay in denial because we don't want to admit we were wrong once again. being in denial stops us from fully getting hurt and leaves us to believe that we can change someone. People don't change unless they want too. Some people are better at showing emotion than others and some just don't care like they say they do. it's hard to differentiate between the two. when things do a complete 180 in a matter of hours without explanation we start to way over think. there's always anwsers but whether you get the truth or not is dependent upon maturity. just remember when good things change, its because better things are comming.

complexity

i dont know why we all hang onto something when we know
we're better off letting go.
it's like we are scared to lose what
we don't even really have.
some of us say we'd rather have
something than absolutely nothing,
but the truth is, to have it halfway
is harder than not having it at all.

you're all over the place

You change your mind
Like a girl changes clothes
Yeah you, PMS Like a bitch, I would know
And you over think
Always speak Critically
I should know That you're no good for me
Cause you're hot then you're cold
You're yes then you're no
You're in then you're out
You're up then you're down
You're wrong when it's right It's black and it's white
We fight, we break up We kiss, we make up

You don't really want to stay, no
But you don't really want to go
Someone call the doctor
Got a case of a love bi-polar
Stuck on a roller coaster
Can't get off this ride
You change your mind
Like a girl changes clothes

just a little bit

there’s still a little bit of your taste in my mouth
there’s still a little bit of you laced with my doubt
it’s still a little hard to say what's going on
there’s still a little bit of your ghost your weakness
there’s still a little bit of your face I haven't kissed
you step a little closer each day
that I can´t say what´s going on
there’s still a little bit of your song in my ear
there’s still a little bit of your words I long to hear

love over

foggy nights

I swim across an ocean It's my matress in the basement I'm sweatin' out excuses That would make your stomach turn The road we drove last night Stretched from the desert to Las Vegas We filled our cups, and lit one up The snow began to burn maybe, we were made, We were made for each other Ahh, is it possible for the World to look this way forever? I talked so much, I'm sure I didn't realize I'd gone crazy Didn't catch my bloody nose Or that my heart tried to explode I still live with my High School friends Some people never change at all We're still the same compulsive drunks We were when we were small A long way from from a firework daze But i still like to burn,I'm always in the haze of a car crash,The orange airbag dust covers everything;everything

I always find ways to sum you up in a paragraph

How does it feel watching your life go in a useless direction? lying to live "happy"? How does it feel keeping untrue friendships alive? When you think about her does it kill to know it's ALL your fault? Does changing in 48 hrs make you feel more powerful? More real? More true to yourself? Did you know most people know what you're all about? And the people who know you the deepest you push away.Does that take away your sense of vunerability?Put a Stable thought for a moment in your life?Build a wall higher then the one remaining? Ever considered where you'll be 5 years from now? wreckless? Alone? Emotionally Unstable? It's slipping right through your hands just like she did.Because of the lack of effort you give to the things that "mean most" Life itself is being thrown away like a unopened book.And while you allow it you're throwing away your future,your happiness,your love and your respect.

How does that make you feel?

mask up

1. Most people don't know
   who they are.
2. that's why they lie
3. They're afraid someone else
   will figure it out before they do,

jokesonme

I've been waiting since birth to find a love
that would look and sound like a movie

So I changed my plans and rented

a camera and a van and then I called you

"I need you to pretend that we are in love "
and you agreed to

somehow.right.

what's destined

And I've always fall fast with too much trust in the promising that
"No ones ever been here, so you can quell those wet fears"
and I want purity, I must have it here right now.
But don't you get me started now

When we laugh indoors
the blissful tones bounce off the walls
and fall to the ground.
Peel the hardwood backs
and let them loose from decades
trapped and listen so still.

it's realistic?

I want so badly to believe that "there is truth, that love is real"

And I want life in every word to the extent that it's absurd

sweetheart

I'd show you what it'd be like to have it all.
So when we kiss it'd be something we'll forget,
So every time we do it we'll feel the same again.

subconciously numbing

i don't remember what it was you said
but please dont tell me again
cause i may not remember what you said exactly
but i remember the feeling i got dead on
and i'd rather not feel that again.

mouth zipped up

people who know the least say it the loudest

its synical really

I greased the lens and framed the shot

using a friend as my stand-in
The script it called for rain but it was clear that day so we faked it


The marker snapped and I yelled


"quiet on the set" and then called "action!
"And I kissed you in a style that Clark Gable would have admired

I thought it classic

soon comes faster then you think

sorry

Vague sound of rain pierces through my song again
but I get distracted by the way his toes move when he plays
so I let it burn I just poured my heart out there's bits of it on the floor
And I take what's left of it and rinse it under cold water And call him up for more
And I say baby, yes I feel stupid to call you, but I'm lonely
And I don't think you meant it when you said you couldn't love me
And I thought maybe if I kissed the way you do, you'd feel it too
He said I'm sorry so sorry grabs my wristsas my fingers turn into angry fists
and I wisper why can't you love me, I'll change for youI'll play the part
He said I'm sorry so sorry

anatomy

I submit no excuse. If this is what I have to do,
I owe you everyday I wake. If I could,
I would shrink myself, sink through your skin
to your bloodcells and remove whatever makes you hurt;
but I am too weak to be your cure.

its a ambulance ride

I could not believe that you were fast asleep
And I felt like those flashing lights
On the ocean floor, at the liquor store
It's not the type of secret that you want to keep too long
Look for me but I'll be gone
Take your love and step it down
Spin around the room 'til you have to choose
Maybe I'll pick both of them
Maybe neither one
Every time the phone rings it sounds like a song
Look for me and I'll be gone
You can't sing to save your life
Through the alcohol
Drinking champagne off the walls
It looks like after all
They still talk about us like they've got nothing else to do
It could have been lines And after all this time
They'll still talk about us like we're not even in the room
Outside the birds sing Louder than the phone rings
Every night you fall asleep with your headphones on
Look for me and I'll be gone

oh sweet baby

Just keep walking Because it won't be worth your time tonight I'm not listening ;It seems like you only ever want to say goodbye And I feel it every time that you walk into a room Lights start flashing inside my head I can't get past all the things you said I believed in Even though I knew they just couldn't be true Not coming from you
Don't start acting like you're the only one who ever cried There's someone just like you For every burned-out building filling up the sky I feel it every time that you walk into a room It's so hard to stay in love when you can't trust anyone

imoral distress

it's a cold night but i warm up as you walk by and i'm watching you i always do and its alright i've dreamt this dream a thousand times and this time i know what to do where do we go i don't wanna wake up spinning in slow motion as we fall apart you can throw out the instructions we don't need them anymore i know where we are going if i could just get out the door you've got your perfect hands over my nervous heart i could never act this way again ;not afraid of falling down, wait up wait for the sunrise i cannot blink while looking in your eyes; talk to me so beautifully i can't feel alone when i breathe you in i can't feel my lungs

I've got another confession
I fell to temptation
And there is no question
There was some connection
I've got to follow my heart
No matter how far
I've gotta roll the dice
Never look back and never think twice

newyear

Live it with no regrets

laugh out the problmes you have

remember anything in highschool

doesn't matter after it

keep your head up high

and keep your self respect

you only have one so don't take things

for granted.

don't live to love; love to live

2008*